Any market trader will know that their livelihoods depend on a number of factors, ranging from the weather, to whether the tennis is on, to how many weekends there are in a month. But the patron saint of all market traders is the lowly gazebo. They come in all shapes, sizes and qualities, from the humble garden gazebo that you have to stick all the poles together to put it up camping style before watching it take off into the sky with one breath of wind, to the crazy heavy duty types that require their own team of men to manhandle.

I am the proud owner of two. One is green, goes up ok but let’s in the wet when it pours with rain, hardly ideal. The other is blue, is beautifully waterproof but is almost impossible to put up. Again, hardly ideal. Both reside in my garage.

Blue Gazebo and I don’t get along too well but with the stormy weather predicted for today I thought he better come with me. I’d already packed Green Gazebo so pulled him back out of his snug spot in the car and prepared to wrestle Blue in his place. As I approached Blue I noticed rather a lot of spider webs all over him. Now, I am Chief Spider Remover in our house so I’m not a complete girl but this was spider mayhem. Loads of those thin but big spiders. I tried knocking them off with a long pair of scissory things and came across what I can only assume was Spider King. A huge hairy beast of a spider who quite simply held his ground and refused to move. I’m not ashamed to admit that by this point I was almost in tears, defeatedly, and hurriedly as I was now late, repacking Green into his car spot, resigning myself to a wet and miserable day and leaving Blue to the spider colony. Ironically, it barely rained and Green did just fine.

It almost feels like there should be a moral to this story, a teaching moment perhaps… But there isn’t. It’s just a story about how the spiders stole my blue gazebo.

Find me tomorrow at Rochester Farmers Market, Corporation Street car park where, thank God, they provide me with a gazebo so both mine can stay at home. 9-1. I’ll be there with brownies and coffee ;)